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Got to Dash

by Cadwallon
(creative writers at www.morewriting.co.uk)
It was mother who sent me round to check on Catherine. "You're going to be up there for that conference, so why not arrange to stay in her spare room? Your sister's been acting strangely recently and I think it may be to do with some man she's met. You know how vulnerable she's been since Greg ..."

I rolled my eyes. "Come on Mum, can't you do your own dirty work?" - But she just flashed me one of her looks, so I resigned myself to playing detective.

Later on I rang Cath who sounded quite pleased to hear from me, but said I wouldn't get much in the way of hospitality because she had been too busy to do any shopping. That sounded like an odd excuse for a trained chef who loves her food.

Probably too busy with her new man, I thought ...

Anyway, I was under strict orders from Mum and finally won sis round by offering to bring food and wine. I also ended up promising to help her out with the shopping. The women in my family are so demanding!

The first day of the conference was utterly fascinating and I stayed on at the end to try out some of the new mobile phone gadgets displayed on the stands. I must have lost track of time, because next thing I knew I was being ushered out of the hall so they could lock up. How they expect to sell anything with that attitude, I'll never know!

On the way round to Cath's, I stopped off at Betterways to pick up the meal. The frozen pizzas didn't looks too inviting, so I had the bright idea of impressing her with my own culinary skills. I was wandering up and down thinking what to buy when an assistant with a Julie name badge asked whether I needed any help. I told her I was hunting for ingredients to quickly knock up a roast dinner. "After all," I said confidently, "it's just a lump of meat and a few vegetables and Mum makes it look so easy".

"I think you'll find it takes quite a while to roast meat, so why don't you try one of our 'Healthy Gourmet' range. You can just pop that in the microwave and no one will know. Oh, and you'll find a lovely Merlot on offer at the wine counter. It's my favourite."

"Brilliant," I said. "Thanks, Julie. If you ever need help with mobile computers, I'm your man." I gave her my card, which she slipped into her breast pocket.

When I arrived at the flat, Cath seemed bit down and distracted so I told her to leave the food to me and headed for the kitchen. You know how it is with other people's kitchens? Everything seems to be in the wrong place. Well, try as I might I couldn't track down any tinned vegetables, beans or indeed anything to go with the frozen meal. So I poured out a couple of drinks and took them through to find out where I'd gone wrong.

"Cath, the kitchen cupboards are bare. Have you given all your food away to charity?"

"No, Nick, I just haven't had a chance to get to the shops, like I told you."

"But Cath, I've been looking forward to your gastronomic treats ever since Mum suggested I drop in ..." Cath picked me up immediately.

"Mum suggested you do what! I'm not a child, you know. I'm 32". And with that, she stomped off into the kitchen.

She was still grumpy when we started eating, so I took a swig of wine and told her all about the conference to cheer her up. But, bizarrely, she didn't seem particularly interested in comparative technical statistics of mobile computing platforms.

After we'd cleared up, Cath brought me a cup of coffee in the lounge. "Thank you for the meal, Nick, it was a good idea to get something ready made. I am afraid the coffee's not going to be very nice though because I've only got powdered milk."

"What is it with you and buying food nowadays, Cath...? Look sis, Mum is concerned - she thinks you've been sounding a bit upset on the phone recently and wondered if it was something to do with your new fellah?"

I braced for the onslaught, but it didn't come. Instead, she went all dreamy on me. "Ah, he's lovely. I first saw him at the swimming pool and we got talking over a sandwich afterwards. He keeps quite fit - Well, very fit, actually."

This was great news. Cath's ex-husband had turned out to be a real rat, dumping her after the miscarriage a few years back - but that's another story.

"So, when can I meet this 'hunky' swimmer, then?"

Her face fell. "You can't and it's killing me..."

I was shocked. "He's not been beating you up, has he?"

"No, he'd never do that. Bob's wonderful and at the end of last month, I finally plucked up enough courage to invite him round for a meal. I thought I'd treat him to something special. It's been such a long time since there's been a man about the house".

"Erm... I'm a man," I said.

"You know what I mean," Cath said, pulling a face. "I went to Betterways and that's where it happened. For some reason I suddenly went all hot and dizzy. I couldn't breathe and had to cling onto the trolley. Then I felt terrible shooting pains all across my chest and thought I was having a heart attack like Dad did."

"That sounds awful. What happened?"

"An assistant asked me if I was alright. Of course, I didn't answer - couldn't answer. I just stood there panting like an idiot. I simply had to get out, so I left the trolley and ran, bumping into people all the way to the car. I was sitting catching my breath when I saw people coming out of the shop and pointing. Then, if things weren't bad enough, a store detective came over to find out if I had been trying to steal something. Oh, he was very pleasant about it all; suggested I see a doctor. The whole episode was totally embarrassing though."

"Did you go to the doctor?"

Cath slumped back in the chair. "Well, I felt ok as soon as I got home so didn't bother. I was really annoyed with myself for being so stupid and rang Bob to ask if we could rearrange the meal because I hadn't been feeling well."

"So, didn't that sort things out?"
She shook her head. "The following day I drove down to the supermarket and was fine until the doors slid shut. The walls closed in on me and I felt all on edge as if something terrible was about to happen. I'm sure people were staring, thinking 'there's that mad woman' again. Then the store started spinning; I couldn't catch my breath and pins and needles spread all down my arms, so I dumped the trolley and rushed out. It was horrible."

"Tell me you went to the doctor."

"No, after I'd calmed down, I rang Bob and made another silly excuse for not meeting him. I said I had to look after you because you couldn't get into a hotel. All I could think about was not letting him see me in this state."

"That's right, blame me!" I said, instantly regretting being flippant.

But Cath continued as if she hadn't heard. "I went to see Dr Peterson who examined me and said I was fit and well and had simply suffered a panic attack. She said I wasn't going mad and my heart was fine ... Of course, that's ok for her, but how am I supposed to show my face in the supermarket again? What if I get in there and collapse in a heap?"

"You'll be fine now ... It's only a shop," I said hopefully.

"You'd think so wouldn't you? But I'm on edge just talking about it. The doctor said it might be me being nervous about starting a new relationship, although she pointed out these things are never straightforward. She told me how the body prepares for 'fight or flight' when confronted by a challenge, but sometimes gets it wrong."

"What are you supposed to do to stop these panic attacks happening then?"

Cath shrugged "She gave me this leaflet to explain it all."

"Let's have a look," I said.

I sat down next to Cath and scanned the leaflet whilst drinking my coffee.

"It says here you should concentrate on breathing slowly and deeply. Also if you breathe into a paper bag, this can raise the carbon dioxide, slow your respiration and stop the attack ... Apparently, anyone can get these panic attacks and you probably won't need any tablets unless they persist. And look here - you should try to concentrate on what the doctor said about you being physically fit and well and that will help you beat the feeling."

"Well, I'm ok now. It's just the thought of buying the food for Bob's meal that sets it off ... And the worst of it is, I've arranged for him to come round tomorrow night."

"Ok, here's the deal," I said. "In the morning, I'll skip the closing session of the conference and let's go to the supermarket together. I'll be with you and have a paper bag ready so nothing can go wrong. However," I said, rubbing my hands, "as payback, I insist you cook me your fantastic creations. Then I can meet Bob and - err, I'll take some notes for Mum."

Cath frowned.

The next day, I parked as close as I could to Betterways' entrance and marched Cath in before she had a chance to think. She stopped the trolley at the end of the first aisle and started looking round the shop. I noticed her face was quite pale and her fingers white from gripping the trolley handle. I said, "Don't worry. Rest here a moment and take a few deep breaths, no one's looking at you." But, that wasn't quite true. A member of staff had spotted us and was heading our way.

"So, how may we assist you today, sir?" It was Julie, the girl who'd helped me the night before. "Oh, examining the fresh vegetables are we, that's a bit adventurous for you isn't it?" We both looked at Cath.
Cath took a deep breath and smiled, her colour returning. "He's with me, actually. He's my little brother and I'm going to show him how to cook for himself. His Mum's looked after him for far too long."

Julie winked "Well, if you need any more help choosing wine for a young lady, I'm always around."

I was just about to show Julie my new videophone, when Cath grabbed my arm and hurried me off the next aisle. "Can't have you making a fool of yourself in my supermarket, we've shopping to do" she said. I was speechless.

By the time we got back to the flat, Cath was a changed woman, flouncing about pretending to be a TV chef as we restocked her shelves. Then later, when Bob arrived, she started showing off like a teenager. I'll let her off though, because she did prepare an absolutely mouth-wateringly delicious dinner.

Personally, I don't know what she sees in this Bob bloke. He doesn't even have a computer and he's far too tall and muscular for his own good. Cath probably hasn't realized yet, but she'll certainly have to keep the cupboards full from now on if she takes him on long term. What I'm really hoping though, is that she'll not have any more panic attacks now she's broken the ice with Bob.

After we'd eaten, Cath started dropping hints about me getting on my way, so I collected my things. At the door she gave me a big hug and thanked me for helping her. She also made me swear not to tell anyone, particularly Mum, about her problem.

As I set off, I knew I was in trouble. The first thing Mum was going to do was try and wheedle the story out of me.

Then I had a brainwave ...

I drove round to Betterways to see if Julie had any more helpful suggestions.


The authors and editors of this article are employed to create accurate and up to date content reflecting reliable research evidence, guidance and best clinical practice. They are free from any commercial conflicts of interest. Find out more about updating.

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