Connnstipation

by Chris Dawson

I've pushed n strained and forced and squeezed
Well what's a kid to do?
It's been like this for days and days
And I still can't do a poo
I spose I'll have to tell someone
But how do I explain
I'm going to have to sort this soon
It's leaving me in pain

Phweeew I'm really glad that's out
No daft, I haven't been
I mean went and told my mum
But I wasn't very keen
I should have told her sooner though
And not left it this long
But she knew how to sort things out
And just what was going wrong

The Doc gave us a pot of pills
And I took two that very day
He said that they would do the trick
And clear the block away
Well goodness me, wow, oh boy!
I was on the loo that night
I can't tell you how pleased I was
To witness such a sight!

There's no way I would play again
That constipation game
I'll keep things nice and regular
So every day's the same
I eat so many different things right now
And get roughage in my diet
Sometimes it's makes me fart a bit
So you really ought to try it!

I eat my fruits, I eat baked beans
And even veggies too
Sometimes I have some cereals
All to help me poo
But you have to drink some juice as well
Though Water's really best
They help to keep things moving
And give your bum a rest.

But most important, most of all
I go now every day
I sit and do what's natural
And send it on its way
You never want to hold it in
Or stop yourself from going
Cos it can cause you problems then
Without you really knowing.